silver sister Archives - NIKOL JOHNSON

Silver Sister Spotlight with Maryam

June 29, 2018 ·

Happy Friday Ladies, I am so excited to feature Maryam Remias today as one of our fierce Silver Sisters. I found Maryam on YouTube a couple of years ago and loved her spunky attitude and fun beauty videos. Let me introduce her to you.

Maryam lives in Los Angeles, California with her husband Eric and eight-year-old daughter Arianna. Maryam creates makeup, beauty and gray hair videos on YouTube and Instagram. Her favorite thing is to hang out with her family at the beach. She loves Persian food and Korean BBQ. It’s safe to say she’s a major foodie.
Before her YouTube career, Maryam had a corporate job working as a graphic designer. When she had her daughter, she decided to stay home with her, but because of her workaholic nature, she needed to do something else besides being a stay at home mom.

At first, her hobby was collecting makeup and binge-watching YouTube videos. At the time Maryam was silently going through depression and was feeling very lonely, and YouTube was her escape. Her husband suggested she start her own YouTube channel rather than watching other people’s videos. Creating beauty videos began as a hobby but now has become an exciting career path for Maryam. The community of supportive women encourages her to keep going.

Q: Gray Hair is becoming a huge movement right now, when did you start embracing your gray?

I discovered few strands of gray on the crown of my head at age 19. At that age, I related gray hair with being old. So, I refused to let anyone see my gray roots, and that’s when hair color and I were inseparable.
Through my mid 20’s, I had developed skin allergies to hair colors. I knew something was wrong with coloring my hair, but I wasn’t ready to show my gray.
It was in 2014 that I started to embrace my gray hair journey. What led to me embracing my grays was that I was tired of coloring my hair every two weeks and the skin allergy on my scalp had gotten terrible.
I remember the day when I thought that growing out my gray hair could work for me. I had looked up gray hair on Pinterest and found beautiful older women with naturally gray hair. Also, pictures of young women with colored gray hair that looked fantastic. That’s when I started to become curious about how I would look with gray hair.
I spoke to my husband and showed him the photos on Pinterest. He was supportive, and we both wanted to see how it turns out. I’m very thankful that it became a trend because it gave me the courage to stop coloring my hair.
So, I started my transition journey and embracing my gray hair in 2014.

Q: You have a YouTube channel where you teach women about beauty and style did you feel insecure doing videos with gray hair?

I was insecure in the beginning about doing beauty videos as a 40-year-old woman with gray hair. It was scary to put myself out there and get out of my comfort zone. I was also going through so many ups and downs with transitioning to gray hair.
The only way I could deal with the emotions was to talk about my gray hair transition on video. I used my YouTube channel as a vehicle to tell my story and share my journey with others.
I figured by sharing my story I would help someone going through the same situation and hopefully make an impact in their life. Check out my Playlist HERE

Q: How do you encourage other women to start their gray hair journey?

The way I encourage other women to start their gray hair journey is by sharing my story and sharing tips on how to get through their transition. I give the resources that helped me transition to gray hair. I also share the videos that I’ve made about gray hair on my YouTube channel.

Here are a couple of resources that I used on my journey.

• Looking up “Women with Gray Hair on Pinterest” – You’ll find many beautiful women with gray hair with different skin tone and hairstyles.
• I also recommend joining Gray Hair Facebook groups – They are a very positive and an encouraging place for anyone going through the transition.
• Lauren from How Bourgeois was an inspiration to my journey to gray hair

Going gray is not for everyone, and the only way you know for sure is to try it out. You may fall in love with your gray or silver hair and never think about coloring again.

Q: Do you feel that gray hair is a trend or a movement?

It was a trend for younger people to dye their hair gray but that trend seems to be going away.
In the past six months, I feel that there is a movement of natural gray hair. I’ve been seeing lots of women with gray hair on social media sharing their transition journey or just rocking their beautiful gray hair.
It became undeniable when a few months ago, Maye Musk became the new face of CoverGirl. I also knew that beauty industries view of women with gray hair was changing when beauty companies started to reach out to work with them.

Q: Social Media can be harsh at times with the negative comments. How do you handle negative comments about your gray hair?

It can be very harsh. I’ve gotten my fair share of negative comments on Instagram but very few on YouTube. What’s weird is that I get negative comments from women close to my age, but the younger generation is more accepting.
I don’t answer negative comments because the people writing them are looking for attention. I believe that the more focus you give the negativity, the more you receive it.
My hope is for everyone to embrace their uniqueness, no matter what their hair color, size or age. We all have a voice and story to tell, and we can all learn from each other.

Check out Maryam on Instagram and YouTube where she shares beauty for women over 40 and tips on transitioning to gray hair.

Silver Sister Spotlight with Hayley

May 18, 2018 ·

I am very excited to feature Hayley another Silver Sister from Australia; I am obsessed with booking a flight to this gorgeous country in 2018. Hopefully, I can make that happen.

Hayley is from the beautiful Gold Coast In Australia and has two gorgeous kids and happily married. When Hayley was younger, she worried about what others thought of her and suffered from body image issues, but after having a large cancerous tumor removed from her abdomen when she was twenty years old, it made her realize life is too short. Since then Hayley has tried hard to live in the present moment which is sometimes easier said than done. Hayley finds that Yoga helps her with living in the present and she makes practicing Yoga a priority.

Before having her kids, Hayley worked as a makeup artist and still uses her make up skills by volunteering with The Look Good Feel Better program that teaches and helps women battling cancer to know how to apply makeup and work with their skin after chemotherapy and radiation. When Hayley is not working, she loves to study Italian, and she currently sings in an Italian choir for fun. Traveling and learning about different cultures is one of her passions.

A few years ago she came across pictures of young women with natural grey hair who looked amazing. She thought, what if Mother Nature got it right? What if my natural hair color suited me? So she stopped dying it and has never looked back.

Q: When did you first start seeing gray hair? What were your initial thoughts?

I saw my first grey hair twenty years ago when I was sixteen! I wasn’t too fazed but a little surprised if anything thought it was funny. Being that young, there was never a feeling of “Oh no I’m getting older.”

Q: Being Australian do you feel Australian Society is more accepting of gray hair compared to America?

Australian culture is influenced by America, so I think the beauty ideals are similar. I have had overwhelmingly positive feedback and not one negative comment about my hair but Australians are pretty laid back, and if someone didn’t like it they’d never tell you to your face. I do feel like we see a shift here in what’s considered beautiful and diversity is genuinely embraced.

Q: How did you become a gray hair model with Silver Fox Management?

I read an article about Silver Fox Management and it caught my eye as my husband called me his Silver fox. I thought why not? I sent a photo in, and they replied. Silver Fox Management said they would love to sign me on. I’m also with Extra Edge talent, I’ve been doing some extra work with them they too are big fans of my hair, and it’s uniqueness. A casting director told me recently “Don’t ever color your hair; there’s no one else that looks like you!”

Q: You seem to be very passionate about supporting women, can you tell us how you share and encourage women to embrace their beauty?

I think a woman supporting other woman is powerful; we need to boost each other up. I also have a ten-year-old daughter; I want to be the best role model I can be for her. Embracing and accepting your true self and living an authentic life is a message I like to convey. It goes beyond hair and what we look like it’s celebrating our differences and experiences that make us unique. A few of my friends have recently stopped dying their hair, they don’t have grey hair yet, but they colored their hair because it’s just what they felt they had to do. I’m not against people wanting to dye their hair by any means but if women say to me that they are sick of going to the hairdresser every four weeks I encourage them to give it a go and see what happens. Nothing to lose!

Q: What has been the hardest transition personally for you going gray?

I had very long dark hair, so I chopped it off to above my shoulders. I didn’t feel like me without long hair, but It didn’t take long to grow back. At first, I was worried what people would think, but as I went along, I cared less and less. You have to rock the skunk look!

Silver Sister Spotlight with Shelly

May 4, 2018 ·

For Our Silver Sister Spotlight, this week is on ‘Dr. Shelly,’ a college professor who teaches undergraduate and graduate students in the fields of instructional design, adult learning, and instructional technology at a large Midwestern university in the U.S. She is married to her high school sweetheart and best friend, whom she met when she was just 14. “We have two beautiful children that I adore with all my heart, both teenagers.” Her latest hobby is training her first-ever pup – a Goldendoodle named Ted – to become a therapy dog at the local Children’s Hospital. “Just looking at Teddie makes people chuckle; I hope he can bring joy to the children and momentarily allow them to escape their illnesses.” She also enjoys just about anything outdoors, including her butterfly garden, snorkeling in tropical waters, yoga, hiking, boating, and relaxing at the family’s lakefront cottage.

I was so taken back when I found Shelly on Instagram because her hair is so dramatic, fierce and tells a story. It takes a strong woman to bravely embrace her gray hair transition. Shelly reminds me of a mix between an extraordinary woman that was in my life when I was a child and Julia Roberts. When you look at Shelly’s gray hair journey documented on Instagram the beginning pictures have a lot of weight and uncertainty to them. As Shelly progresses, embraces and allows her hair to almost develop like a butterfly you can see the pure light that radiates within her. Bold, Fierce and Owning her beauty. Ladies, this too will happen to you. I am so happy that Shelly agreed to be featured on Beauty Reinvented, her hair has a story to tell, and we can learn so much from her journey.

Q: At what age did you start seeing gray hair and what made you decide to ditch the dye?

I saw my first gray hair when I was 18 years old. Without blinking an eye, I bought a hair dye kit, and that was the beginning of three decades of dying. At that young age, it was already programmed in me that gray hair was something to hide. We must change this mindset. I found my daughter’s first silver hair last month. I have encouraged her to think about not coloring her hair, should more silvers appear. Let’s encourage our beautiful daughters to love their whole selves to be confident in who they are, not in who society tells them they should be.

Q: You have a very powerful transformation. How did you feel when you started seeing the white roots?

I was admittedly horrified. Society has deeply entrenched us to think that silver hair on women is unattractive, yet men are more distinguished with their gray hair. It is ingrained in women that gray hair is ‘old, ugly, shameful and that we should go to great lengths to hide it.’ I have made significant strides in my evolution of how I perceive hair color. I now see the white, silver, brown and steely gray as unique and now that I am 11 months into my journey, see a complete picture of what the end will look like and I cannot wait! There is no one else in this world that has my unique blend of natural highlights and lowlights. I am 100% unique now! No more hiding, no more shame. It feels so good just to accept it and move on.

Q: Did you find that society was shocked by your decision to be authentic with your hair color?

I was really worked up about what people would think, but the truth is, people truly do not care about other people’s hair. Most ignore it. Some are confused. Some think it is intentionally dyed to look this way. One man said, “Wow, you must have paid a fortune for that hair color!” I have heard a couple of ignorant comments. But what I love most is when I catch another woman glancing at the new hair growing out of my head because when she smiles back at me, I am 100% certain I have encountered another Silver Sister in the making, and I hope I have given her pause to consider accepting her silvers.

Q: What do people say to you about your hair?

I have had more compliments in the past year than I have ever had in my entire life put together! One woman chased me down in a furniture store to tell me how gorgeous she thought my hair was, and she ended it with “And I’m a hair stylist so I should know!” Random women and men have stopped me to tell me they like my hair. I stand out now. I am different than any other woman I know in my age bracket. I am a Silver Sister who has broken that bloody awful cycle of dying my hair and feeling the need to dye my hair every week because of the white halo that emerged about five days after every dye. What kind of quality of life is that? Every seven days I was embarrassed to go out because my roots were visible and it looked awful. I have had a humiliating year at times with a really awful demarcation line, but it was worth the trade because I am free now, and empowered. I am no longer held down. I have a greater quality of life, and I have so much more time to enjoy my life because I have broken this vicious dye cycle. I lived for the dye. It dictated my life. It was like a drug that I needed a hit off of to make me feel good. I am coming up on my “Silver Anniversary” – the one year mark of having a healthier body and mind since ditching the dye. I am so happy to be in this place.

Q: You have mentioned in your Instagram posts that your body became very ill from the toxic dye. Can you tell us what symptoms you had?

My body started to systemically reject hair dye in ways one would never directly correlate with hair dye; and now that I no longer dye, my symptoms have almost all disappeared. It started with digestive symptoms and food intolerances a few years ago and then moved to eczema of the eye. Every time I colored my hair, my scalp burned for days. After my last professional salon dye 14 months ago, my scalp was so damaged that every time I brushed my hair, electrical shocks were sent to my eye. Within 24 hours of my last home dye on May 6, 2017, my body went into anaphylactic shock, and for days I carried an Epi-pen with me, even slept with it, I was so fearful. I could not eat anything without my body reacting; my body was red, swollen and itchy; my scalp on fire; my heart raced for weeks every time I ingested any food or drink. I honestly thought that my hair was going to kill me. My body was outraged, and it finally drew the line in the sand. Enough was enough. (And no thank you to all who have recommended the natural, organic hair dyes. I’m done!)

Our skin is our biggest organ, and when you make it absorb the toxic chemical frequently found in darker hair dyes, Paraphenylenediamine (PPD), it can have a dangerous impact. I fear the damage I have done to my body with dying my hair so regularly, and for so long, as it has been linked to cancer (American Cancer Society, 2018). Educate yourselves before starting or continuing on this journey. There are options!

Q: How have you dealt with the anxiety and self-doubt that gray hair brings?

I do believe that “gray anxiety” exists and it can be depressing, debilitating, and frightening for some. We have started a gray revolution because we want to empower women to embrace who they are, to reform beauty standards, and to learn to accept and love themselves as they are. I think many women mourn their youth so ditching the dye in a way, becomes symbolic of accepting we are growing older, that we are not immortal. And similar to mourning, I think there are stages we must work through on our journeys – shock, sadness, depression, and eventually, acceptance.

After recognizing that “shaming” my hair in front of my kids was only perpetuating societal views on going gray, I refrained from speaking negatively about my hair ever again. I relied heavily on my biggest supporter, my husband, who tells me every day how beautiful he thinks I am. I decided to be openly gray this time and never used the temporary hair colors to diffuse the demarcation line; for me, it made going public even harder after hiding and then revealing the hair again. I also found great strength in the Silver Sisters who are part of my Instagram family. They are the most evolved, loving, compassionate, and supportive women. They are a close-knit group; they accept you when you fail, shower you with love when you need it, inspire you with their confidence; and humble you with their honesty and vulnerability. Many of the Silver Sisters are professional models, who are showing the world it’s okay to age; it’s okay to be gray. Nikol, you are one of these women. Thank you for your inspiration to the gray revolution and reinventing beauty!

For more inspiring pictures follow Dr. Shelley on Instagram @ Silvertransitions.

Silver Sister Spotlight with Rhiannon

April 27, 2018 ·

I have decided Friday’s will be the day that I feature our Silver Sister Spotlight. I think it’s a great day to kick off the weekend and give you some hardcore inspiration. Today I am featuring the gorgeous Rhiannon not only is she rocking her gray hair journey as a young Mom she also has curly hair. I know so many of you struggle with gray and having unruly curly hair. Rhiannon shares with us in a bonus question what hair care products she uses to tame her curly hair.

Rhiannon is a Licensed Esthetician and Cosmetic Laser Technician but decided to stay at home for a while to focus on her kids and her health. Rhiannon will be celebrating her 15th wedding anniversary this year and is very excited about this milestone. Her husband’s support through her gray hair journey means the world to her. Rhiannon posts YouTube videos of her documented gray hair transition. She recently created an Instagram account to continue inspiring others as well as herself. Her followers love the fact that she’s not only growing her gray but that she is also a naturally curly girl. There is a demographic of women out there who are looking for ladies embracing both silver hair and curls, hence the title of her channel: Silver Curl Journey. Rhiannon hopes to be an example to her daughter, showing her that gray hair is ageless and beautiful. Head on over to Rhiannon’s YouTube Channel and Instagram and show her some Silver Sister support!

Q: When did you start seeing gray hair and what were your initial thoughts?

I remember the day I found my first gray hair. I was about 16-years-old, and at the time, I thought it was a rare strand of platinum blonde hair because it had no color. I actually plucked it right out of my head, twirled it into a circle and saved it in a velvet ring box. A few months later, I discovered another one of those colorless hairs in my head. That’s when I realized, “Oh wow. I’m getting gray hair already??”

Q: Did you have support from friends and family with your gray transition?

Oh yes. My husband had been encouraging me to grow out my naturally gray hair for at least a decade. Every time I had a baby, my gray hair would become more intense. He thought it was awesome, but I was having too much fun playing with vibrant highlights and fun box colors just to stop and be natural. When I finally decided to grow it out, he was ecstatic.

Q: As a young Mom do you find other Mother’s celebrating your decision to go gray?

You know, it’s hard to tell. Some of the questions I was getting, in the beginning, seemed very superficial. People thought I was going through a phase. They would ask how long I planned on growing it, whether I liked it or not, etc. It wasn’t until very recently that I finally started receiving what I recognize to be genuine compliments.

Q: You have some very hip and trendy gray hairstyles from braids to super sleek tell us about your personal style.

Oh, thank you! I try to be creative because I do become bored very quickly with my hair. Hence the reason I played with hair color for 20 years. My style is more about simplicity than anything else. My kids have hectic schedules, which means I am always on the go. So whatever I can do in 10 minutes or less is my goal. I hardly ever wear makeup, but when I do, it only takes me a few minutes to apply it. You won’t catch this girl contouring and ‘baking’ her foundation! Ha! I have naturally curly hair, so the easiest thing for me to do is a wash-and-go style. I have no shame in rocking ponytails (synthetic ones are fun!), pigtails, baseball caps, or bandanas on days when I’m in a rush. In fact, I seem to get more compliments when I have my hair pulled all the way back, exposing the majority of my silver hair. That’s when braids come in handy. I braid my hair when I feel like I want a little attention. Haha!

Q: What advice would you give other women going through the first six months of not dying their hair?

Those first six months are the most eye-opening months for both yourself and the people around you. When you own it with cheerful confidence, everybody recognizes that as a type of beauty you didn’t even know exists, even if you look and the mirror and don’t see the beauty in yourself just yet. Your hair changing on the outside is kind of like that cocoon wrapping around that beautiful butterfly just waiting to be revealed. So hang in there! Once your transition is complete, you will feel like a new kind of beautiful. You will flutter around and attract all types of new people and adventures. I mean, look at me! I’m just a regular person who wanted to embrace her natural hair, and here I am being featured on the website of the very person whose videos inspired me to make this decision in the first place!

Q: Working with curly hair can you tell us what hair products you currently use and recommend?

Sure! I use sulfate-free, silicone-free products. My current favorite brand is Cantu. I’ve tried a couple of others, but my hair texture and curl pattern didn’t agree with them as much as they agree with Cantu. If I could sample every curly girl product out there, I would! I just haven’t had the chance to experiment some more. I recommend trying anything and everything until you find what works for you. Some curls do well with silicones and a little sulfate. I don’t believe in a one-size-fits-all method for curls. However, for those with curly silver hair, it is an absolute MUST to avoid too much heat (flat irons, etc.) and to use colorless products. Any cream or oil tinted with even the slightest shade of brown or yellow will stain our lovely white strands and dull the overall appearance of our hair. When and if that happens, there are plenty of purple shampoos that will help correct it. 🙂

How To Get a Gray Attitude

April 25, 2018 ·

Ladies I get it, going gray is not fun no matter what your age. All the stereotypical statements go through your head that people say from “I am so old,” “Grandma Hair,” “Frumpy old lady.” You name it you’re thinking it. So what are you to do? Default to what society says is beautiful and young? Allow your negative self-talk to keep you from being true to yourself? Or keep on dying your hair, so it looks entirely unnatural for your age? Maybe give up and add more toxins every two weeks so that you can feel accepted? I think NOT.

I know gray hair is not for everyone, but I don’t think I need to remind everyone that Beauty Reinvented is all about women that WANT to go gray.

Photo Credit; Rick Gomez Photography

When you are feeling down, and very unattractive how do you pick yourself back up and get in the game? How do you feel confident when all your peers are sporting golden locks or rich chestnut hair? I have created a list for you ladies to print out and post to your mirror or somewhere you will see it on a daily basis. I am your biggest cheerleader because I felt everything you are feeling. I didn’t have a gray-haired role model that did videos or wrote a blog about it when I was first going through this crazy gray transition over two years ago.

When your gray hair journey gets hard, and you are at your last dark hair strand NOW that’s when you need to push for your gray and own it even more. You need to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself “This too shall pass.” Ladies, it’s a hair color that means nothing except for a bold, fierce and downright powerful attitude. If you dyed your hair pink, purple or green like a lot of women, not just teens are doing do you think anyone would care? So why do they care about gray? Think about that for a second.

Here is the plan, read this list below, print it out to give yourself the encouragement you need to get through each day. I promise you it gets more comfortable you have to commit and not look back.

I designed a couple of hats like the one I am wearing in this photo that is available on my website. Perfect for the days where you are just like I can’t take it anymore. It’s a fashionable statement to help you through the growing out period. You have seen me wearing this hat a lot on my Instagram. I love how I make a statement without having to say a word.

Silver Sister Spotlight with Pilar

April 13, 2018 ·

I am a total stalker when it comes to Instagram and women showcasing their gray hair journey. I love that we can all connect on social media and share our unique stories. I found Pilar somehow through all my late night scrolling and I couldn’t wait to share her journey with you. Show Pilar some love and go visit her on Instagram.

Pilar is native Spaniard and has spent most of her adult years living and working abroad. She has a BA in Film and Media and an MA in Screenwriting, she has worked in the film, TV and theatre industries. In recent years she made a career move exploring some aspects of marketing, and she is currently on sabbatical doing what she enjoys most: helping raise awareness and funds for two charities she has been collaborating with for years, and acting as a consultant for one-off fundraising events. She resides in London with her husband and their two daughters.

When did you start going gray?

My last appointment to cover my greys was late June 2017. I had not planned it, it was a simple ‘what if’ scenario. What if I stopped dyeing my hair? What if I liked what I saw? What if it suited me? I talked to my stylist during that last appointment and to my surprise, he was all for it. Next thing I know is that we are exchanging pics of hairstyles for grey-haired ladies. Two months later he dyed my colored hair one last time adding highlights where my natural hair was lighter, and lowlights where it was still dark. I lost a bit of my new growth in the process, which is why I always mention two timelines when I date a picture of my hair, but it was definitely worth going through this five-hour long appointment at the salon.

How did you feel going gray in your forties?

I started seeing greys in my early 20s, and they kept multiplying until I first dyed them in my late 30s. I was familiar with living with a certain amount of greys and I knew I had a lighter streak at the front but I had never imagined that my hair would be so much more salt than pepper now.

I am the only one among my friends who has grey hair and does not color it. I initially thought that this might affect me, that I would feel unattractive and out of place when around them. Then there were the thoughts about work. Since the prospect of applying for jobs that will involve face-to-face meetings with clients is considerably high given my background, I also thought that my hair would be an issue when I start interviewing again after my sabbatical. It turns out that I am delighted with my decision of going grey and I do not feel that I am less just because I do not conform any more to the norm of hiding my silvers if anything this has made me stronger. And if my silvers are an issue to a potential employer, then that company would not be worth working for!

I have gifted myself three hours of my time every three weeks, and I do not have to worry anymore about calculating when to dye my roots so I would look on point for a certain event or holiday. I can’t wait for my hair to be all grey, but in the meantime, there are many ways of looking stylish. What’s not to like about this?!

What’s been your hardest challenge going gray?

In all fairness, the process is being a lot less challenging than I had anticipated. The first few weeks were certainly the most difficult. Getting used to the idea that my natural roots were here to stay took me a bit of time and a lot of staring at them in the mirror. I knew there would be no more color appointment so I made the effort of wearing my new growth with pride, and I only used colored hair powder and sprays on two occasions: a gala dinner and a wedding, both at the beginning of my transition. I attended family weddings on the third and fourth month of my transition and on both occasions I asked for a hairstyle that would bring out my silvers rather than hide them.

Also, I noticed early in my gray transition that if I wanted to succeed I could not neglect my hairstyle or my make-up on a daily basis. For someone used to air dry her hair and with zero make-up skills this has probably been the most challenging part, and yet I am enjoying it: it’s never too late to learn new skills!

What advice do you have for the woman that gets negative comments about her gray hair?

I have not received many negative comments so far, and I am certain that my extremely positive attitude about going grey has a lot to do with this. Transitioning to grey is quite a bumpy ride, and the key to success is to own your decision. Feel confident, and people will see beautiful silvers and the prospect of a healthy mane rather than grey roots.

You may get compliments from total strangers and the nastiest of comments from close friends or relatives. Your inner circle will have the greatest impact on how you feel during the transition. Be prepared for insensitive comments, and some funny looks, especially at the beginning of the process. My husband had never wanted me to dye my hair so he was very supportive, even when my roots looked like a hot mess. My children… well, that was a very different story: they almost cried! I was the cool mum all their friends wished they had and all of a sudden they were picturing me as this 100-year-old grey haired witch that children see in animated films… and they reminded me of it on a daily basis! Then there were my friends, most of them encouraging me to do this with just one or two friends telling me how old I would look and asking me to color my hair again, to do it ‘for them’… But the real shock came when my own mother, who has never dyed her hair and has a wonderful healthy silver mane, told me I should not stop coloring my hair because it would age me. Of course, determined as I am when I want to do something, I listened, smiled, and carried on with my business. Eventually, those who openly opposed to my grey journey, in the beginning, have now either come around or given up on me. Remember that there is one certain thing about novelty: it wears out!

What made you want to share your gray hair journey on social media?

When I started this journey I found stunning grey-haired ladies who inspired me, ladies whose hair made me dream that one day perhaps mine would be half as beautiful. As a matter of fact, your Instagram account was one of the first relevant accounts I followed, and it’s not just your incredible grey hair that I love.

I am not a model, nor am I a fabulous photographer or even have decent equipment (I mostly post iPhone selfies), and I certainly do not have a glamorous life… at least not always! I am just a girl next door many women could relate to, a practical woman who is consistent with her lifestyle choices, and I created @silverlocksshining with that in mind. Instagram is the ideal platform to quickly share the ups and downs of my everyday going-grey life, and other women who may be considering taking the plunge can see what I am experiencing: the challenges, the changes (some of them deeper than just hair color), the hair growth at every stage… Lots of headshots, which may help others overcome a rough phase or maybe picture themselves with grey hair. Even if every journey is different, seeing that someone has been there too and has managed to go through it can encourage others to stay the course.

Sharing my journey on social media also helps me keep focused and see the evolution myself. We all have days when we think nothing has changed in weeks and this visual record proves me that my hair is indeed growing and that it is now stronger, healthier and much shinier than all those years I was throwing color at it to cover those silvers I am now in love with.

Silver Sister Spotlight with Melanie

March 6, 2018 ·

Hey, beauty industry hear us ROOOOAAARRRRR! That’s right next up is our beautiful Melanie a thirty-nine-year-old retired Social Worker turned full-time wedding florist and part-time beauty YouTube guru. She is a Mother of a precious six-year-old daughter, married to her best friend and loves all things beauty, specifically makeup and skin care.

Melanie like most of us is trying to figure out how to care for her new gray hair situation. Melanie started going gray in her mid-twenties and fought it for years until in her mid-thirties she decided to finally let go and embrace the new her by letting her gray grow out. She comes from a long line of strong German women who went gray very early in life. Both her Mother and Oma have the most beautiful silver hair and they were her inspiration to finally give herself permission to “let it go.” Melanie feels it was the best decision of her life and has not looked back. She loves the journey that she is on and she is so excited to see so many Silver Sisters embracing their natural beauty when it comes to their hair.

Follow and show Melanie some love on her social media outlets here: Instagram, YouTube

1. Tell us why you made such a powerful video titled “Why is My Hair Gray on Purpose.”

For the most part, the vast majority of my regular subscriber base was really supportive of my decision to let my hair transition. They were super encouraging. But others, not so much. I decided to make a video about why I chose to embrace my gray hair because while I received a lot of support, I was also constantly getting comments on my video from people as to why I would ever even consider letting my hair go gray. People told me I looked 20-30 years old than my actual age. It honestly got to be frustrating either deleting or constantly responding to these comments that were clearly aimed at making me feel like I was making the wrong decision. Comments like “You’d be so much prettier if you didn’t have gray hair.” really started to anger me. My decision to go gray was based on a personal choice. A choice I did not feel I needed to get permission for from anyone. My gray hair actually made me feel 1000 times more confident and beautiful than my “fake blonde” hair ever did. My gray hair was me. I stopped fighting the inevitable and embraced a new version of me and I loved it. And the negativity from others surrounding that decision honestly just irritated me and I wanted to address people’s “concerns.”

2. You decided to stop covering up your gray, how did that make you feel? Were you liberated or did you feel like it was a mistake?

I felt amazing once I finally decided to take the plunge. I guess I had a little confidence boost from the fact that so many younger girls were dying their hair gray at the time. I figured, no better time than now! I went to my hairdresser and we came up with a game plan to transition my blonde to gray. There was never a single ounce of regret. As soon as I saw my hair gray in the mirror, I knew I had made the right choice. I loved the way it looked! I knew it would take time to grow everything out, but I knew I could do it. Having the help of a talented hairdresser really made the transition much easier for me.

3. As a Mom with gray hair, how do you encourage your daughter to embrace her beauty and self-confidence?

I have always encouraged my daughter Stella to be herself. I have never imposed a certain beauty norm on her. She has always naturally gravitated towards being more of a girly girl. Her style is definitely feminine. As soon as she could choose her own outfits, I let her pick her clothing. She was under the age of 2 the first time she showed me a preference in the way she wanted to dress and how she wanted her hair. She didn’t like pigtails or ponytails, so I never made her wear them. She liked accessories like necklaces and I let her style all her accessories by herself. She is always so proud of what she comes up with. While it doesn’t always “match” it makes her happy and that is all I want. I also make sure she knows that beauty is more than just someone’s outward appearance. Being beautiful on the inside by being a kind and caring person is far more important than any outfit or the lipgloss you wear. I’m proud to say that my girl is one of the kindest more generous little kids I know. I’m so so proud of her!

4. How has your personal style changed with gray hair?

Honestly not a ton. I think the season of life I am in, the mom to a super busy 6-year-old season doesn’t really allow me much focus on style. I am a classic soccer mom leggings/yoga pants and tunics kind of girl right now. Fashion is really not at the forefront of my mind at this point in time. I hope it gets to be again someday, but I’m ok with where I am at right now. I work for my job and my current lifestyle. My makeup has changed a bit. I do tend to gravitate towards cooler colors now that my hair is not blonde any longer. Warmer tones don’t always look best so I have to be careful. But I will still rock a rusty brown eyeshadow if I feel like it 😉 I don’t think your hair color should really dictate your personal style necessarily. You may need to make some tweaks to feel like you look your best, but that is 100% up to you.

5. What advice do you have for women just starting out in their gray hair journey?

My biggest piece of advice for someone starting out on their journey is to ignore the negativity that some people may throw your way. Don’t let “well-meaning compliments” like “You look so much better/younger/healthier with your blonde, brown, red hair” faze you. If you think that now is the time for you to start on your journey, then do it! And don’t look back, unless YOU want to. Do not let other’s dictate your journey in life. If you want to be gray, be gray. If you don’t because you are just not personally ready, then wait. But do it for you! It’s not necessarily easy to grow your hair out. While a good hairdresser can get you started, it’s a very different reality to wake up in the morning and see yourself with such a drastically different color. It can feel like you are having to let go of something big. But look at it as a new, exciting journey where you get to be the new you. Wiser, bolder, more adventurous. Embrace this new look and just go for it. Just don’t listen to others. No one has the right to tell you how to rock your hair. That’s up to you 😉